painting 01 | oil and chalk on canvas | 2025

this painting has gone through many irritations of titles: here comes the sun, patchwork from the ground up, sit still, etc. but all the titles represent one thing; acceptance. acceptance of self through the rollercoaster of life. this painting represents the process, the pull between myself and the release that came from it.

earlier this year i was feeling a lot of things i didn't understand and i wanted to express that confusion to help me better. i had the urge to express myself through paint -- something i have never done before. so naturally, i took a fabric canvas and started painting, i used all the colors you can imagine, stroking left and right with no direction. i took black chalk and wrote all over it thinking i was basquiat or something.

the results were tragic and the painting sat for months and months.

I kept staring at it, wondering what I wanted to do with it, but no ideas came to mind. Then, one day, the piece spoke to me. Yes, it spoke! (I believe artists can hear what their creations are saying to them, and this one told me to cut it up.) So, that's exactly what I did—I cut it into a whole bunch of small squares.

then the image started to unfold to what you see today. i stitched the pieces together, painted the background blue and arranged the pieces in a way that feel dreamy and childlike.

i believe I am the original painting: a vibrant, chaotic, and aimless. this year, i learned to embrace those feelings, much like the painting i pieced together one by one and i did the same for myself. the blue background represents the calmness and peace that came with me allowing myself to experience all that i was holding in. the stars represent the dreamlike state that i constantly find myself in, and the green represents the growth that will happen with the acceptance of myself.

you see life and art are very similar in that way. both are full of mistakes and randomness but the best artist and people know which mistakes to keep and share with the world.

accept, release, keep experiencing.

with love, arleny